Home > Sermons > July 22, 2007

The Girls

“Mom, make Mary help me.  You gave us all this work to do – washing the dishes, setting the table, sweeping the floor – and Mary won’t do anything.  She is just sitting here.  She acts like she is in another world!”  Typical childhood sibling complaint. We can even assume something about birth order  – surely Martha is the older sister and Mary, the younger. 

Mary and Martha may have been at this argument for years. We can’t really tell from this brief story.  “Lord, Mary has left me with all the work. Tell her to help me!”  

A Party 

Like Martha any of us can get overwhelmed by the duties of being a host or hostess.  I remember a party at my home.  It was a holiday. We prepared all day – cooking, cleaning.  Everything had to be right. I was a sweaty mess about the time the guests were to arrive. So I took a quick shower and changed clothes.  But then I had to get the barbecue going. I struggled and worried over the grill.  I, also, offered to help my wife with the things she was working on.

I spent the whole evening going from one thing to another, until I was finally about to stop and visit.  But, by then the guests began to leave. I had missed the whole party. Did you ever do that?  Any host or a hostess can get so concerned, that they miss the party.  That’s Martha’s story.  

Jesus, Mary and Martha

Who were these women?  Martha was the head of the household – not usual for a woman of her time.  She must have been a person of means – to be able to entertain like that. This story only mentions Jesus as a guest, but it seems he usually traveled with a retinue of disciples.  So, if Martha was entertaining a whole bunch of men – perhaps women, too – she wanted them all to be well-taken care of.   

She worked hard to be a good hostess. She did what was expected of a woman of her day and time.  She worked so hard at it, that she got confused about what was important and what wasn’t.  She surely started out with joy – to show her love for God and her care for Jesus.  But she got so busy, whizzing around in overdrive, that she started operating totally out of a sense of duty and obligation– no more, the sense of love. 

Martha was ‘distracted’ – so distracted she burst out with anger toward her honored guest, complaining to him.  Surely whatever faux pas Mary might have committed in the eyes of the guests Martha’s outburst was worse. 

But was Jesus really an honored guest, or was he more like one of the family?  Other stories – like the one about the death and raising of their brother Lazarus – suggest that they were very close.  Maybe Jesus had already been present to Mary and Martha’s sibling rivalries. 

I wonder what was really going on?  Do you think Mary was really slacking off?  Or had she already done a lot of preparation already?  Maybe Mary and Martha had such different temperaments they didn’t see the hosting job at all alike.  We don’t know enough about them to judge. 

Mary Acts Like a Man

But, clearly, when Jesus was there, Mary made it a point to be with him.  Mary was acting like a man in her culture. So she was bringing shame upon herself and her family.  Good women didn’t sit at the feet of a teacher like Jesus.  They would serve him as Martha was trying to do.  Mary had no cultural right to sit there and listen like a man. 

But Jesus took Mary’s part.  He did it ever so gently, though. He did not pounce on her sister, but spoke calmly to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.”  Mary was affirmed, but Martha was rebuked in love. 

Identifying with Mary or Martha

Probably we can all identify with either Mary or with Martha – perhaps with both of them at times.  But if I took a poll this morning and asked you to choose whose side you would take, I guess many of the women would choose Martha’s.  You know what it means to get stuck with the work. 

The men might be more likely to choose Mary’s side. Jesus chose Mary’s side. Was that because he was a man?  Or was there more to it?  More, I hope. 

The Story in Context

We might take this story out of context, and try to make it the final word on hospitality. But stories in Scripture are seldom that easy.  Perhaps you remember two other stories in this 10th chapter of Luke.  One we read last week –  the story of the Good Samaritan – reminds us that showing real hospitality identifies a true neighbor. In that story we are taught not to catagorize our fellow human beings as an in crowd and an out crowd.  We are all to be neighbors to one another. The story is about faith defined through hospitality.  

An earlier story in this chapter is about Jesus sending 70 of his disciples out two by two.  They stay where people where they are shown hospitality. And when people do not, they are to move along.  Neighborliness and hospitality are important parts of this ongoing narrative in Luke.  

But this Mary and Martha story suggests the tension. Martha is trying to live out the ‘hostess with the mostest’ scenario, but Jesus rejects it. Actually, it is as if Jesus is really the host in Martha’s home.  Mary seemed to get it, but Martha couldn’t.

  

Martha was so very practical, trying to make everything perfect.  But Mary was on an inward journey.  Mary was thinking, praying, and studying the Scripture.  Sitting at the Master’s feet, she was  enjoying their time together. Both Mary and Martha were passionate about what they did, but Jesus favors Mary’s passion over Martha’s.  Martha was not a bad person, just distracted from what was important.    

Mary and Martha – Life in Balance

There are of course times to be more like Martha and times to be like Mary.  Where would we be if no one washed the dishes or put out the garbage – if no one bought the groceries or paid the bills?  It is important to do the things Martha was concerned about, but not to get so distracted we think those things are what life is really about.   

A family needs Martha keeping things going – and Martha needs help – she can’t do it all on her own.  But a family needs Mary, too, to remind everyone to take time to reflect, to sit still, to read, to visit and to enjoy other people.   

A church is a family.  We need both Mary and Martha in the church, and at times each of us may be either of them – hopefully never distracted, though, but always in balance. Mary is not 100% right all the time, but she was right that day. And the work Martha was doing was necessary – but she just got obsessed by it.  The placement of this story in the Scripture helps us see the issue of balance.  Jesus was thankful for Martha’s preparation, but pleased with Mary’s friendship and discipleship. 

As we go into a congregational meeting this morning, we may be thinking about all of the things we have to do. We may get obsessed like Martha did.  There’s a bit of Martha in each of us.  But Mary – taking time to be the real disciple ... How can we encourage the Mary within us and among us? 

Issues like the one between Mary and Martha’s boil up in the church.  You are planning a rummage sale. Almost every church I have served has a rummage sale. Some people come and work  for many days, even weeks or months, to get ready.  But others don’t show up at all. Who is right?  

Do some of you feel like running to Jesus to say, “Look, my brother has left me all the work make him do something”?  But, Jesus says,  “Martha, Martha, you are distracted about many things, one thing is important.”  

Why do we do rummage sales, anyway?  My personal opinion is that Church rummage sales are primarily a type of fellowship – a way for the people to get together with a little fundraising on the side. So if you enjoy it, by all means work on it.  If you get to the point that you do not enjoy it, you should go home.  

And that goes for any and every thing in the church.  If teaching a class becomes more of a chore than an work of love, you may have become distracted.  If singing has gotten to be too much for you, then the choir is not your place to be.  If working on a board or committee has become a distraction, remember what is really important – sitting at Jesus’ feet. What can we do as a congregation to balance the responsibility that Martha represents with the reflection and joy that Mary knew?  How can we learn to take a breather – to sit at the feet of Jesus? 

Betty’s story

Let me tell you about Betty. 

Betty is an amazing woman. When people hear all that she does for her church, they have a hard time believing that she is in her mid-eighties. Betty arrives early every Sunday to take care of  practical matters. She unlocks the door, opens the windows, brings out cups and napkins, and starts the coffee all before worship. She has been doing this for years never seeking attention or drawing attention to herself. Betty just does what she has been doing, Sunday after Sunday. When people suggest that she slow down, she simply will not hear of it.

That's not all Betty contributes to her church. Each week in her Sunday school class Betty listens intently to the lesson. On most Sundays she will share some insight from her many years as a practicing Christian. She never disagrees with what anyone says, but simply shares her thoughts. People of all ages love and respect Betty and gladly welcome her thoughts and ideas.

       (from Emphasis in Sermonsuite, www.csspub.com)

Conclusion

Betty balances the Mary and Martha roles.   We are challenged to do the same. Perhaps we all live with the two sisters  – we are the sisters.  How will we keep them in balance?  “Martha, Martha, you are distracted about many things.”  Jesus could say it to you or me – in our daily lives – in our church life.  Can we hear the words, “Mary you have chosen the better part.  It shall not be taken from you.”   Amen.